By Jose Jara
47 Meters Down
“My Verdict: 47 Thumbs Down”
By: Daniel Guzman
Maybe I’m being overly harsh to 47 Meters Down by titling this review 47 thumbs down, or maybe I’m not. I think I’m just giving you fair warning just like the signs in the film Jaws at the beach saying, “Beware of Sharks in The Water”, but my warning says, “Stay Away from Theater, Cliché Shark Movie Lurking!” I fell prey to this one and my only hope is that I spare others the time and money by forewarning them that this shark film is only worth an outing to Redbox on a day they’re in desperate in need for a cheap scare.
Now mind you, I went in to see 47 Meters Down accepting to grade it on a curve giving the lack of depth a shark movie tends to come with. I did the same thing some time last year for the other recent shark film “The Shallows.” In that instance, I was pleasantly surprised by Blake Lively being able to solely carry the film as well as the fresh scares the director delivered. 47 Meters Down actresses Claire Holt(Kate) & Mandy Moore(Lisa) could not carry this film and were immediately sunk down by this movie’s abysmal dialogue and idiot antics that they were asked to do while being underwater. Quick synopsis: 2 sisters, Kate and Lisa are in some island vacationing after Lisa is dumped by her longtime boyfriend for being boring. Kate and Lisa meet some stereotypical good looking native dudes that offer to take them into a shark cage the following day. Lisa is hesitant about doing something so dangerous, but her sister encourages her to prove her ex-boyfriend wrong. They meet up the following morning and jump on board in Captain Taylor’s (Matthew Modine) decrepit boat that holds a rusty shark cage that should come with a tetanus shot prior to entering into it. Let me stop there and just tell you it was cringe worthy acting that I had to put up with for these 15-20 minutes, just to get to the meat of the matter, which is these 2 girls finally getting inside that cage and becoming shark bait.
I won’t deny that once Kate and Lisa are in the water the film does give its audience a few jumps and tense moments with these sharks. I just couldn’t get past how dumb these 2 pivotal characters were setup to behave by director Johannes Roberts in this worst-case scenario. The dialogue continues underwater to be subpar and downright lazy by the writers of this film. I also observed a scene that takes place prior to the girls getting in the water in which Mandy Moore’s character is texting her ex-boyfriend, which seemed like it was ripped off from “The Shallows” when Blake Lively’s character is texting her friend who was supposed to join her at the beach. Final verdict: 47 Meters Down is a poorly made summer suspense thriller, with horrid writing, few frights, and with hope that its audience has the memory of Dori from Finding Nemo, unable to remember what a good shark movie looks like even if they’re staring a shark right in its black eyes.
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